Hopefully you're reading this with your mobile phone tucked safely in your pocket. If so, here are some simple ways to foil any future theft, and avoid copping for the phone bill should the villain starts spanking it 24/7.

• Write down the IMEI number: Some phones have an IMEI number which is a unique identifier for the phone. You can obtain this number by typing *#06# (star hash 06 hash) into your mobile phone and it will display a 15 digit number.
• Prime the phone lock: Most mobile phones feature password protection, so make full use of it. That way, if your phone is nicked, the thief will be faced with working through dozens of combinations, and may not be able to crack it at all.

• Call your phone service provider: Report the theft as soon as you can. Your provider will have a set procedure to suspend the service and can take you through the details.
• Don't have the number for your service provider? Call the Immobilise mobile phone crime line on 08701 123 123. They will give you the right information so that your stolen phone can be quickly blocked across all networks in the UK, even if the SIM card has been changed. This can be done for both contract and pre-paid phones.
• Give them your phone's unique serial: Bet you're glad you made a note of it now, huh? A couple of keystrokes at their end, and the villain with your phone might as well have nicked a brick ... it would be more useful to him now the mobile's been disabled.
• Make a police report: Involving the police may not guarantee the return of your phone, but if you have a billing contract with your phone provider (as opposed to using phone cards) you may need to show them a copy of the report before they'll issue you with a new phone. Just don't go phoning 999 to report the theft. Be smart and drop into your local station instead.